"Daddy, I only want to watch Wonder Pets with happy endings. No one can get hurt. No sad stuff!" – Clara, hiding in the bathroom
It should be noted that every episode of The Wonder Pets ends happily. Some just require more work on the Wonder Pets part in order to make this happen.
This is what your mother looks like while watching The Walking Dead, little ones.
She does not handle scary things well.
Ever since your friend, Sadie, introduced you to the television show Doc McStuffins, Mommy and I have been subjected to numerous checkups at the hands of a less-than-gentle, exceptionally repetitive, demanding doctor named Clara.
The checkups are almost always identical in terms of what you do, what you discover and what you prescribe, and while it can be unbelievably cute at times, the sixth checkup of the afternoon can begin to get a little old.
I never thought I’d say it, but I miss Dinosaur Train.
Mommy and I think Barney and Friends is a dumb television show, little one.
Granted we have never actually watched the program, but we can just tell.
In an effort to keep the show from ever polluting our television, Mommy has poisoned your mind by making derisive comments about the program whenever possible.
It worked.
When Sesame Street ended this morning and a preview for Barney and Friends came on, you pointed at the television and said, “That purple T-rex is yucky!” and then pretended to spit on the ground. “A-puh! A-puh! A-puh!”
I find myself feeling both exceedingly proud of your taste in television, little one, and a little dirty at the same time.
Sometimes a couch and a couple pillows just aren’t good enough, little one.
Sometimes you require a couple of carefully chosen friends, a strategically placed umbrella, a well worn winter hat and your favorite red chair in order to enjoy Sesame Street.
I fear you are going to be extremely high maintenance, little one.
You’re a big fan of the Three Little Pigs, little one.
Gramps first taught you the story with the help of the Three Little Pigs houses that he gave to you.
Then it was reinforced through repeated viewings of the story on The Wonder Pets.
Lately we have been reading an odd, morally ambiguous but otherwise entertaining version of the story to you in which the wolf appears at the door of the brick house wearing sheepskin.
Now we hear you acting out your own version of the story quite often, with a variety of other animals and little people getting involved from time to time.
You can accurately identify a triceratops, and a poor facsimile at that, little one.
Perhaps that Dinosaur Train show isn’t as stupid as I had thought.